Disclaimer: I may be rambling incoherently here, please forgive me. It's an emotional subject.

I grew up as a Jehovah's Witness. At an early age, it wasn't forced on me so much as it was all that I knew. I had an entire childhood of meetings and subtle indoctrinations, and nothing seemed out of the ordinary until very recently. The more I share about my childhood with people, the more they point subtle differences out that lie with the Watchtower Society. The way we indoctrinate children into wanting to grow up to be policemen, firefighters, and veterinarians, I was indoctrinated to be a missionary, a Publisher, and a Pioneer (Publisher and Pioneer are WTSpeak for people who go door to door). For a while in my 'tweens, my mother pulled away from the WTS, and I was given a taste of what the world was really like. At sixteen, I was confronted by a pair of JW elders I had met at a friend's door. They wanted to study with me. When I brought it up with my mother, she was so happy that I had to say yes. I couldn't say no. That was the beginning of the worst of it. After enough studying, I eventually began to believe. The belief grew, and I became a staunch WTS supporter. I would go on to be baptized, and from there they would try to make a leader out of me. I studied their doctrines, and argued with a lot of people over the finer points of the JW faith. My own studies led me to certain sites on the internet, and I found dirty little secrets in the WTS' past. When I went to an elder about them, I got in trouble. It seems I had done a little too much research. That convinced me that all of the secrets I had learned, like the 1975 prophecy, and the UN NGO status, were true. It took me a long time to get the courage to leave that cult. For a few years, I was torn between putting up a front of belief for the congregation and my mother, and being who I really was and wanted to be. When I was 20, that all came to a head. I left the WTS.

I'm sharing this because I want you to know that I have dealt with cults before. I've been involved in one for most of my life. I've been through the love bombs, the fear, the use of my own family against me. I know the pain of being trapped in a dangerous cult that just wants more and more of you, but you're terrified you have nothing left to give them, or that you'll lose yourself in the process. I've watched them ruin lives. They almost ruined mine. I am well aware of what Anonymous is facing because it has been a major part of my life.

Scientology parallels the tactics of the JW inculcation process (a process so thorough, I am still using JW buzzwords like inculcate) in every way, but requires such ridiculous sums of money from the rank and file that even Jehovah's Witnesses and Mormons pity the Scientologists. I used to say that Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses pity ex-Mormons, and both of them pity ex-Scientologists. There is no doubt in my mind that the kind of people at the top of the Jehovah's Witness religion are the same kind of people who lead Scientology. They use fear and insecurity to get what they want from their followers. The process is almost Orwellian in nature.

When I heard about project Chanology, I was excited. I knew immediately what I had to do. Breaking out of a cult is the hardest thing some people will have to do in their lives. It was for me. I felt morally obligated to help others do what I had done if they wanted to, just as ex-JWs had talked with me to help me out. What the WTS has done to me has had me on an emotional roller coaster for the last five years. By helping the Scientologists who want out, maybe I can work through everything that's happened to me, and know that some good came out of it. Or maybe not. Maybe all it will take to make these feelings go away are some anti-depressants and a good cry. Nobody really knows, but is it worth trying? Absolutely.

Something about this must be working. I've never felt so justified in something in my entire life.

To any Scientologists reading this who may want to leave their religion, I have this to say. I was exactly like you once. I was terrified. The real world is big and scary, and the world you know is small and familiar. I understand that more than you will ever know. You have to ask yourself a question. Do you want the promise of perpetual misery, or a small chance of true happiness? The answer may seem obvious to many, but I understand that it is not. I was where you are, asking myself the very same thing, and going mad over its subtle complexities. Take into account your family, your friends, your very understanding of the world around you, and pick the one that YOU truly want. Nobody else can make that decision for you. If you choose the way I did, I will be here for you. I will listen, and I will understand. I will offer my hand to you, and help you, because I truly feel for you. There are no conditions for this help. You will never have to give me money, or tell me your most shameful secrets. If only Church of Scientology could offer the same. All I want is for you to understand that it is better to have a walk-on part in the war than a lead role in a cage. I made the same decision that I am asking of you, and I would make it again.

To the Church of Scientology:

I have dealt with people like you before.

You have never dealt with anyone like me.

I will not forgive.

I will not forget.

Expect me.
.

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