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Say what you will about the politics of Vladimir Putin. I am completely ignorant of Russian politics outside of the South Ossetia conflict, and I'm no expert on that.
But damn if Vladimir Putin isn't a paragon of manliness. The other week, on a light-hearted jaunt through the woods with animal conservationists, he tranqulized then wrestled a tiger. I am not making this up. A tiger was about to attack a camera crew, and he tranquilized it, then made sure it was subdued. Think about that. This means he had the damn tranquilizer gun on him already. You know he must have been just itching to shoot something. Then he runs in and jumps on the damn thing. You know, just in case. He didn't mistake his buddy for a quail and shoot him in the face. No, his aim was true, but that wasn't enough. He needed to devestate that tiger while it slept. If this was a friendly visit to see the progress of the tigers in captivity, I'd hate to see what it's like when he goes hunting. He must bring an RPK and a tactical nuke. Just in case.
Not since Theodore Roosevelt and the bear has there been a story like this. I'd hate to be that fucking bear. You're a bear, the shark of the forest trying to make the best out of living in a cave and having to catch fish with your mouth when some mustachio'd yahoo in a pith helmet pumps you full of lead. Then he goes and blabs to the whole world about it and someone makes a stuffed animal and names it after him. There must have been no sadder day in the history of bear-kind.
Add to the fact that in recent Russian political news, a rally was interupted by a rubber penis mounted on a remote control helicopter. Why can't American politics be this awesome? Where our politics sounds like the bickering of children over who gets to press the End of the World button, Russian politics is rife with sophmoric frat-boy pranks. Equally stupid, but a lot more fun.
But damn if Vladimir Putin isn't a paragon of manliness. The other week, on a light-hearted jaunt through the woods with animal conservationists, he tranqulized then wrestled a tiger. I am not making this up. A tiger was about to attack a camera crew, and he tranquilized it, then made sure it was subdued. Think about that. This means he had the damn tranquilizer gun on him already. You know he must have been just itching to shoot something. Then he runs in and jumps on the damn thing. You know, just in case. He didn't mistake his buddy for a quail and shoot him in the face. No, his aim was true, but that wasn't enough. He needed to devestate that tiger while it slept. If this was a friendly visit to see the progress of the tigers in captivity, I'd hate to see what it's like when he goes hunting. He must bring an RPK and a tactical nuke. Just in case.
Not since Theodore Roosevelt and the bear has there been a story like this. I'd hate to be that fucking bear. You're a bear, the shark of the forest trying to make the best out of living in a cave and having to catch fish with your mouth when some mustachio'd yahoo in a pith helmet pumps you full of lead. Then he goes and blabs to the whole world about it and someone makes a stuffed animal and names it after him. There must have been no sadder day in the history of bear-kind.
Add to the fact that in recent Russian political news, a rally was interupted by a rubber penis mounted on a remote control helicopter. Why can't American politics be this awesome? Where our politics sounds like the bickering of children over who gets to press the End of the World button, Russian politics is rife with sophmoric frat-boy pranks. Equally stupid, but a lot more fun.